Because no one wants to be a Judas…

Up until recently, I had no idea that the church could be broken people swapping stories, cocktails, and no longer necessary baby items with one another.

I had no idea that discipleship started with a “How are you?” and “Lets grab a coffee.”

I had no idea that life changing situations started with “It’s ok” and “That’s life! No worries.”

You could ask any of my siblings, my parents, or an annoyed friend, but at a younger age…I knew a lot.

Or at least I thought I did.

As a child, you’d swear embarrassment and irritation told you that you were right and others were wrong (like really…am I the only one who went through this??) BUT…

after two very strong willed children, the grace of a never-ending God, and countless encounters with the American poverty line… knowing it all is really…all gone.

I am more aware then ever that the capacity to learn and grow is endless. I am also miraculously aware that the grace of God covers every lesson, slip up, and mishap along the way. (This is valuable information I could have used at a much younger age.)

But really…looking back at the 9 years of disillusionment, the 7 years of struggle, and the past 6 months of God cutting through to partially cloudy skies… well lets just say I wouldn’t swap any of those time segments.

I would have missed out on the melancholy.

the pain.

the desperation.

the pleading.

seeing my own empty and endless selfish requests.

the humility of knowing…I, in the truth of the perfectness of God, am still a far cry from all Jesus is…

And that at the beginning, middle, and end of every season is the sacrifice of Jesus.

Realizing that in an effort to be (and strive to be) a “successful great follower like Paul” that I turned out like “Judas Iscariot…the betrayer of the Son of God.”

Let’s just say…that changes the game.

Knowing that I look at me, Judas…and God says, “You are like my son….Jesus.”

The wow-factor continues…

It’s only because I am covered by the sacrifice of Jesus Christ that I even have the possibility, the opportunity, to look like Him.

That’s Paul. He realized he in no capacity deserved the honor of presenting the gospel of Jesus. But instead God built the church on  him.

And that’s where we are today.

Imperfect people. Having a cocktail. Sharing the love of Jesus the best way they know how.


One thought on “Because no one wants to be a Judas…

  1. Wow! Incredible! So simple a realization, so long a journey. And what is so humbling is God saw it all, and still He made a way to His heart, a way and a place we do not deserve, but are eternally thankful for. Amen? Jeff

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